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American Idol 2 Rigged By Mike Morelli According to Linda Simmons, the recent election of Ruben over Clay in the much famed American Idol competition was completely fabricated and fake. “There is no way that America would vote that Negra as their Idol…this was rigged and I, I demand a recount!” she told her daughter after watching the show. “I don’t know, I wasn’t really watching,” claimed Eric Thompson, College Freshmen “I think that Rueben should have won because Cray is fat…and that doesn‘t make any sense, he can‘t be fat…” said little Timmy Timmelson, first grader. Clay Aiken, the runner up in this years contest, said he would not pursue a lawsuit or recount against the record company, because his penis was stapled to their desks. Although Rueben claims to have won fair and square, he refuted, that his real goal was not become American Idol, but to “…Fuck some white woman…” - Stogiebros.com 2003