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Everything below is an actual newstory*


100-year-old celebrates her birthday by smoking 170,000th cigarette

Ancients knew chocolate was good

Human species in a race for its life

Boy, 5, subdues rabid fox to protect family

City attorney toughens case against Jew

CNN Readers Show Their Love of Halo 3

Cop shoots at snake, kills boy, 5

Could Mr. Right be Mr. White?

Man Mad at God drives into Church

Many Men have 'Small-Penis' Syndrome

Dog mauls autographed Vick ball

Drunken driver runs over toddler, grandmas

Experts warn of lightning-strike injuries with iPods

Boys Lemonade Stand Robbed

Did Bush make Brown his BFF?

Is Gilbert Cheating at Halo?

Man Blames Cat After Gun Fires

Sicko is Socko in Cannes!

NAACP Buries the N-Word

People, bears in record number of clashes

'Hungry' Man Rips Off Duck's Head

Police seize magic trick from preacher

'Bachelor' Candidate is Serial Rapist

'Sixth Sense' actress expecting a baby

Study Food in McDonald's wrapper tastes better to kids

29 Year-old-Grandma!

Hillary Duff feels pressure to be thin

The complicated measure of being Hispanic in America

Tired of slights, embarrassment, man sheds 87 pounds

What if Lincoln had lived?

Why Mary-Kate Olsen won't smile

Women drawn to men with muscles

Young women drink, party, post

Dear Mr. President, Send Even MORE Troops




*All stories did appear on a news website and were saved onto our servers so as to preserve their stupidity. No content within the articles themselves has been changed.








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2008