           
|
Observations on Philadelphia Added January 21st, 2006 Now that I’ve been in this city for like a billion years, it’s pretty much safe to say that I know everything there is to know about Philadelphia and don’t need to know anything else. I went to the cheeseburger plants, climbed the mountains, ate at the puppy mills, and even went to Boztown (of course, named after the football great, Brian Bosworth). The most friendly people I have met here, by far, are the indigenous Ghurkas, whom are nice and love to climb mountains. They told me that the biggest mountain in Philly was just past the ocean to the west and near the waterfalls of the north. So far, I have climbed 11 of Philly’s 24 mountains, and before I leave here, I plan to conquer them all. There was something that was a bit of a surprise to me, and that was Philadelphia’s vast population of Malayans left over from the Third Burmese War. They are rude, and feisty. I was waiting in line for a hot dog, and this Malayan cut in front of me. I said to him, “excuse me, I was in front of you.” This guy flipped out, he started yelling in some strange language and pushed me and then got in his tricked out Honda and sped off. I’m never going to Kota Baharu town again. As far as hangout spots, I’m really into the Ash Wednesday Storm of 1962 Memorial in the Pohamba Park off of the Namibia Expressway. Last week I went to the 50th Anniversary of the Tibetan Autonomous Region Party and the Liberate Taiwan Movement Parade, which was great. All of the ethnic Malayans are afraid of the Ghurkas, who hate them as well as the Chinese, and I hung out with them the whole time and talked about mountains and bikes and stuff. So far, I’m having a blast here. I never thought I’d be able to live in such a clean and distinguished place. Philadelphia, I believe, is the number 5(?) city in the U.S.A. behind Houston, and a class 4 International City. In conclusion, I just can’t wait to go to Houston. It’s got to be better than this shit hole. 2006 |
